A Living Tantra reader asked about desire.

A question about desire is a question about freedom. When we are compelled by desire, that is, by our habits of desiring this and not desiring that, we call this bondage.

When desire acts creatively, spontaneously and without habitual restriction to a particular object, we call this freedom.

However, the fullness of desire is so far from what most people understand as desire, there is much room for misunderstanding. And the same must be said for freedom.

For instance, in earlier years, I was much attached to a concept of freedom. It seemed like a grand goal and a good candidate for some spiritual banner-waving. But my idea of freedom was still tightly tied to some entity called “I.” “I” would be free. “I” would choose. “I” would experience this so-called freedom.

If you try to imagine freedom without “I” to heroically enact and experience it, you will likely run into a cognitive roadblock. What could freedom possibly be without “I”?

Let’s go back to desire and try to point ourselves in the right direction.

Here it is best to remember one key fact: Reality is simple. There are no oppositions; there are only continuities.

So, there is no opposition between different sorts of desires. There is no “good” desire and no “bad” desire.

There is only one desire expressed in more or less limited ways.

Desire is the power that impels the manifestation of the world.

Iccha Shakti is the Sanskrit word for this power of desire. “Iccha” is often translated as “will” or “free will,” but these translations get most of us into conceptual trouble. They lead most of us back to the old “I” will this, “I” will that concept, as if, behind the scenes of the world, decisions were being individualistically made by that famous white-haired, bearded guy.

Instead, imagine yourself in a beautiful landscape, in any sort of open, beautiful setting with a big sky. You are filled with the impulse to express something in this big, open space. This impulse of expression bursts out as shouting, running, and dancing, rolling around on the ground, laughing, and singing. You even make funny faces. This feeling is something like exuberance. You are delighted, and you move to the impulse of expressing your delight.

This exuberant impulse impelling expression is something like Iccha Shakti.

In the matter of creation, Iccha Shakti is never separated from her sisters, Kriya Shakti and Jñana Shakti.

Kriya Shakti is spontaneous activity. It is the activity of expressing a world. And Jñana Shakti is the wisdom embodied in both the means and result. Iccha, Kriya, and Jñana Shakti make a world together. Impulse, action, and wisdom. These are the three primordial Shakti’s, or capacities.

Now expand your imagining. Now you are not just a figure in this landscape, but you are the entire landscape.

You are the ground, the plants, the luminous, open sky, the little animals and the birds above. Every cell, every atom, every thing and space itself vibrates with the impulse of expression, the impulse sitting behind all creation

Why do I say “sitting behind” instead of “causing?” Because I don’t want you to fall into the trap of thinking that Iccha Shakti comes before the creation of the manifest world in linear time.

Instead, Iccha Shakti is the desire behind everything at every moment. This is desire without origin in a small “I.” It is pervasive desire, or the pervasive impulse toward creation everywhere present.

This desire is non-aggressive and objectless. It doesn’t desire something or someone. It is simply the exuberant impulse that sits behind the world expression.

When we don’t recognize our real condition, this is ignorance, or limitation. Our habitual desires, the ones we can’t just walk away from, are expressions of ignorance. However, they are nothing but the one, pervasive desire under tension.

Unbounded, desire impels the elaboration of the incredibly precise, unimaginably vast multiplicity of our world.

Under limitation, desire is experienced as the force of attachment. “I like this” and “I don’t like that.” Or, “I need ice cream,” or a certain person, or a lot of sex, or a prestigious job.

When we begin to relax more deeply, we begin to relax our grip on “me, myself, and I.” We begin to participate in a less bounded sense of Self. Up to this point, we have only had a concept of individual freedom. Now, this idea of freedom has to be dumped.

Sri Ma Anandamayi used two similar words to speak of the freedom of the creation: kheyala and khelaya. Kheyala carries meanings such as impulse, improvisation, and intuition. A famous type of Indian classical improvisational music is called “kheyal.”

Khelaya means play or sport, as does the more familiar Sanskrit word “lila.”

Kheyala encapsulates all three of the primordial Shaktis: desire, activity, and wisdom. There is an impulse, informed by intuition or wisdom, that gives rise to spontaneous activity. The manifestation of these three all together is Khelaya: the play of duality. Mataji often spoke of “Sadhana Khelaya” or the play of sadhana.

Contrast this situation to habitual desire in which a compulsion, informed by limitation, gives rise to a relatively stuck pattern of activity.

When we embody the cosmic impulse of desire, spontaneous activity, and
wisdom, we become consumate followers, consummate conduits, consummate
listeners, and consummate communicators. We do not become freedom flag
waving power mongers. Paradoxically, we are literally taken over by
freedom.

To assist us in realizing this natural state, Tantrik sadhana makes use of desire under tension, or our attachments, to wean us away from attachment.

For instance, it is useful that we can become attached to Guru or Deva. While we will certainly relate to these in a somewhat limited way, through attachment, we come into relationship with a more expansive mode of experiencing that will eventually teach us to relax attachment. So it helps us to use our capacity of attachment in this way, rather than in chasing after our nightly six pack of beer.

We make use of everything. This is the Tantrik way.

OM Shanti,
Shambhavi

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